There is sad news, anxiety everywhere. I want to totally talk something else. I realised one thing that I hadnt written everything about my life. May be its high time to write all those things and cherish forever.
Its been I believe 11 years my first ever serious relationship officially ended. Ofcourse I am way over it. It doesn't bother me as such. Ofcourse he is happily married with two kids I believe(sorry I am not stalking him but we are college friends so we have like some 40 common friends on FB so its inevitable, we were ofcourse friends on Orkut. Infact all our epic love story started on orkut. he looks so old now LOL) I dont think I would have even gone on a date now:P. But I believe he is a good human being one of the most emotional guys I have ever met only that he had some balls to stick to the promise but its ok doesnt really matter now :)
Actually you know why the thought of writing all my past came to my mind? Recently, I had been to my bff's house. We were just discussing something and she said some incident which I couldnt even remember it was so significant that "She had come to my home to talk to my parents" and she had stayed overnight. It was about Satyam's matter where my dad had called her up and some incident I couldn't even recall.
I was like "Wow half of the incidents I have already forgotten. Ofcourse there wasnt anything sweet about those incidents may be I wanted to forget them" atleast it has stopped bothering me. The only thing it bothers me in all these "I really felt guilty for my parents" they had to go through so much pain in all these. I still feel bad for them. But they didnt listen to me as well. They were forcing me to get me married off and omg it was such terrible times. I used to run away from home. I almost didnt go to my home town for an year. I think I kind of moved to US I just couldnt take all this. Thank God I dont have any such kind of extreme pressure now. Once in a while they still talk about it but then that kind of suffociating enviornment isnt there anymore.
The biggest problem was "With the way I was good in studies, take control of my life in most things I do, they didnt expect that I would do anything like that I would choose the guy on my own" But in all fairness " I always decided what I want in my life. There were two things which was very clear that "1. I will only study what I love and I hated biology in my 12th and my dad wanted me to be a doctor and I didn't want to. So I chose engineering and the second most important thing is that " Whom I will marry". I also decided that I will only decide on that post I get a job till then I will never get into any of this. Even though I kind of had a crush on Satyam during college days. I never made any effort because I wanted to get placed in campus recruitment.
Now coming back to how it all started. Honestly, I dont even remember exactly. All I know that both our names started with "S" and I still remember his registration number was "72" and mine was "78"(wow my memory!) we used to be in the same lab sessions. The funny part was he never attended classes. He hardly attended labs too. I remember that his attendence was so less it was some 13% as opposed to 85% it was on the lab notice period that if he doesnt get his parents to talk to the HOD they will not get entry to the exams in the 7th sem or 8th sem. He was one among few others on that notice period. I just looked at it and laughed. He was good in studies. He used to get descent marks not like topper stuff but good enough to impress me I guess. He was definitely not one of those guys who was seeking limelight in every bit in classes. Not even one of the soo called hot guys in the class. I still recall one of my best friend told me that the only way I remember Satyam is if he ever attended classes he would wear 1 shirt between 7:30 to 10:30 am (that means he just woke up and rushed to the class straight from hostel dorm not sure if he had even bruched lol) and we would get an hour break and when the 11:30 classes would start he would shower and then change and come back to class with different shirt LOL(keen observation by my bff .. LOL) I dont recall or never noticed.
I think it was one of those 7th semister seminars where you have to present as part of your curriculum. The presentation test will be 10 people each and 70-80 was one batch and that means we were in the same batch. We were waiting in the room for the lecturer to come and take up the presentation and I was shit scared to present even to 10 people. For some reason, the presentation session didnt happen and from no where Satyam walked up to me and started talking to me asking about my presentation prep and how his preparation is so bad. We just talked for few minutes I dont know the feeling was unimaginable, its like you wished for something I couldnt believe the butterflies in my stomach. That was the moment to cherish forever. I just couldnt feel my excitement but I still decided that I need to graduate from college first. I think in 8th sem we hardly attended classes. It was just a name sake though, by then I think we were all placed.
The next thing I remember is that every time we appear for the exams, we usually would be in the same room and he is like 5 people ahead of me. While writing exams he would just turn back and stare at me and I would look at him too. It was altogether a different feeling. We never said anything to each other but I loved it and I dont know about him though. I still remember the last day of 8th sem exams. It was finally the end of college but the pain in my gut was unbearable. He was with his friends and I was with mine and both of us didnt say anything to each other but we used to just stare at each other. But I couldnt go tell him and neither did he make any effort. I went back home with mixed feelings that day.
Ah! now one more incident I remember we had a send off party arranged for everybody, it was an evening dinner affair. This was before the 8th sem exams I guess and I was so excited and I really wore a nice saree and to my sheer disappointment he didnt show up for the send off party. But anyways last day of the exam was even worse.
Then the million dollar question how did we meet. I should thank orkut for that. I dont know who sent request but we got connected to each other on orkut! Rest awaits.....
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