Getting through the break up. Its just a time to heal and be ready when you are ready.

 I decided that today I will not write about my depressing break up as much as possible.

I think its going to take gazillion years to get over. I deleted all the dating apps, matrimony apps. I decided am done with all. Sounds like irony right? well when you break up you need to get onto the dating apps and am I crazy enough to not take that route? No its not that. I feel finding your soulmate or finding your partner is more emotional thing, you cant shop them out of some random apps. I strongly believe that relationships are built over series of natural incidents and I cant shop them. Its not amazon where you order a product and if you dont like I can return within a stipulated time and you cant keep a time on building feelings. If someone is meant to be I thought I will do the non conventional way. If something is meant to happen I will bloody wait for it to happen and I will not make any effort from my side anymore. 

Anyways, I decided that at this point in time I will only focus on my work, focus on what I want to do next than anything else. May be time has to tell what is best.

I went to my uncle's farmhouse for few days, its a remote village with a beautiful house and the farm faraway from the city, in a place called Vadagur, near Kolar. I am born and brought up in kolar. 

Kolar was my go to place all the time in my childhood at my grand mom's village. We had big farms which typically they used to grow everything like guava, coconuts, flowers, potatoes, beans , silk plant, pomegranates and so on. My grand parents had cattle as well. My grand mom was the most amazing woman I have ever known. She is my motivation to take care of myself and she always took care of herself and very disciplined. She would get up every day at 4 am in the morning, do her morning pooja post bath, squeeze fresh milk from the cow, make tea, coffee, milk for kids along with the biscuits from our grocery store(she used to manage the cattle food store as well as grocery store and my grand pa used to sell ayurvedic medicines and everybody used to come to him in the village for minor health issues. Trust me he has cured my terrible stomach aches which I used to get during periods using ayurvedic medicine). That was one of the best life I had as a childhood. So by 7:30 my grand mom would have done the breakfast and she would open her store and she would take a small nap by 10:30 or so. She is an amazing woman with great work ethic. We had around 15-20 acres of farms and post their death the whole land is barren, its like a dead area with no soul. I feel so sad to see my grand pa's property like that and the house which i used to play like a kid has now fallen down.

Anyways, my uncle's  farm reminds me of my grand pa's farm. My uncle literally grows everything under the roof, starting from millets, guava, sweet potato, green chillies, coriandar leaves, dill, curry leaves, bananas, roses under  in small portions. It was really a nice digital detox from the city life and nice break for me. I wish the internet was better so I could have stayed for more days. Anyways, had a much needed break when am going through this shitty phase, one day at a time and one thing at a time.

Oh btw the whole village does farming, poultry farms so well that they make huge profits. I have heard that some people make upto 1 crore in an year by farming by growing tomatoes, potatoes alone. Its just that people have to work hard. I seriously feel farming is the best detox and life is much more peaceful.